Onward and upward

Okay, so I know I said I was cleaning--and I was--but it's time for a break. It's like I've been hibernating and it's just time for a spring cleaning of everything. Plus, I'm going to see Dr. Zhivegas at Ameristar tomorrow, and that might include hanging out at my house. I'd rather it didn't, but I do live the closest, so I should be ready. That's my motivation, real or imagined. It just needs to happen. Have you ever seen Dr. Zhivegas? They play cover songs from the 70's to now that are SO much fun to dance to. The guy has a bedazzled microphone and I want to BE that backup singer (the black girl).

Anyway, why am I here? Oh yes, procrastination. So...what's up, guys? Oh, right. *crickets*

Well, life is fabulous here, in case you hadn't heard. This past week at work has been especially uplifting. The project managers invited me to lunch and basically asked me what they could do better or what I would suggest to the people who maybe aren't as good at managing themselves. I think they're doing a great job, anyway, but I didn't know what to tell them about how I came to be apparently so great at time management. Momentum helped, but I've also been practicing this work/life juggling act for almost as long as I can remember. I don't know how to teach it, it's just engrained. Plus, the writer at work told me I'm a really good writer (another work post coming soon), and the team was happy with my concepts for a big long-term project that we presented today.

And that's just work stuff! Outside of work, things are just as good, I think. It feels like I'm firing on all cylinders. A weight has most definitely been lifted, and it was a weight that I either wasn't consciously aware of or that I had become accustomed to--probably some of both. Heh, I even bet that "weight" has a proper name (and some improper ones, lol).

Today I was thinking about how I often don't notice how bad things are when I'm in the thick of them. I know they're wrong or not ideal, but it's not until later--after I've had some separation and have broken the cycle of tolerance that I had built up--that I look back and say "Whoa, that will never happen again" or "I knew I was right about that." And rest assured that if it's something I had control over, it will never happen again. I don't think I make the same mistakes twice, once I've had time to reflect on and evaluate them. I just tend to make the most of what I have at any given time, I guess, and sometimes I don't have as much to work with. Part of me knew that when I was in the middle of it, but part of me also knew that it could be worse. However, I failed to acknowledge that it could also be THIS MUCH BETTER! Why didn't I factor that into the equation earlier? Oh, maybe it's because I was still crawling out of the 2008 pit of "It can't get worse? Well watch this." If that sounds dramatic, it was. I had to crawl before I learned to walk again, though, and now I'm skipping and jumping, too. And dancing, of course (that didn't stop, but pretend it did for the purposes of this metaphor). ;)

I don't know where I'm going from here, and I'm okay with that. All I know for sure is that I've gotten this far and I don't want to go back. I can only compensate for both good and bad parts of the past by creating a better present and future. Leave the past in the past. It's there for a reason. Onward and upward.